Healing Negative Core Beliefs in Black Women Through Narrative Shifting

As a clinical mental health counselor, one of the most powerful patterns I witness in therapy, especially when working with Black women, is the deep-rooted presence of negative core beliefs. 

These are the unconscious convictions we carry about ourselves, often shaped by early experiences, cultural messaging, generational trauma, and societal oppression. They function like background music: always playing, often unnoticed, but deeply influencing the rhythm of our lives.

For many Black women, these beliefs can sound like:

• "I have to be strong all the time."

• "My needs come last."

• "I'm not good enough."

• "I'm too much."

• "I'll only be valued if I'm perfect."

These aren't just thoughts, they're internalized narratives that have been passed down, reinforced by institutions, media, and even well-meaning family members. 

They take root early, and over time, they grow into limiting mindsets that inform relationships, self-worth, career choices, and even how one experiences joy or rest.

The Origin of Negative Core Beliefs

Negative core beliefs often form in childhood and adolescence, shaped by how we were treated, what was said to us, and what we had to do to survive emotionally. For Black women, these beliefs are compounded by unique stressors:

• Racial trauma: Experiences of discrimination and microaggressions often send the message that Blackness must be softened, explained, or hidden.

• Gendered expectations: The "Strong Black Woman" stereotype praises resilience but punishes vulnerability.

• Family dynamics: Cultural expectations around obedience, silence, or caregiving roles can hinder emotional expression.

• Media representation: A lack of nuanced, affirming portrayals of Black women reinforces feelings of inadequacy or invisibility.

These layers of experience shape internal narratives that say, "I'm only worthy if I over-function," or "Showing emotion means I'm weak."

Narrative Shifting

The good news? Just as these beliefs were learned, they can be unlearned. 

One powerful therapeutic approach is narrative shifting—a process rooted in Narrative Therapy that empowers individuals to externalize problems and re-author their personal stories.

Narrative shifting is not about denying the past. It's about recognizing that you are not the problem, the problem is the problem. And through reflection, language, and support, you can choose new meanings, reframe your identity, and reclaim your voice.

How Narrative Shifting Helps Black Women Heal

1. Externalizing the Belief

Instead of saying, "I'm not good enough," we start with, "Where did I learn to believe I wasn't good enough?" This creates distance and allows curiosity instead of shame. It lets clients see the belief as something that was given to them—not something that defines them.

2. Identifying Dominant and Alternative Narratives

We explore the stories that have dominated their sense of self—stories rooted in survival, perfectionism, invisibility. Then, we seek out the alternative narratives: the moments when they resisted, spoke up, thrived, or felt whole. Even if they're small, these moments matter. They are proof that another story is possible.

3. Using Cultural Strengths

Narrative shifting can also draw upon cultural traditions, ancestral wisdom, and spiritual practices. For Black women, this might include honoring matriarchs, reclaiming African-centered values of community and balance, or simply allowing space for softness, creativity, and joy.

4. Therapeutic Journaling and Affirmations

Tools like letter-writing to the younger self, affirmations that center wholeness rather than lack, and intentional storytelling help rewrite the script. Instead of "I always have to be strong," we explore, "I am allowed to need rest and support."

5. Community Witnessing

Healing doesn't always happen in isolation. Group therapy, storytelling circles, or even trusted friendships can offer mirrors that reflect back new possibilities. Being seen—truly seen—in one's evolving narrative is powerful.

Ready to Begin Your Own Narrative Shifting Journey?

If this resonates with you, you're not alone. Many of the women I work with have carried these beliefs for years before discovering they could write a new story for themselves.

Join our newsletter to receive monthly insights, practical exercises, and community support for your healing journey. Each edition includes tools for narrative shifting that you can begin using right away.

Kima is currently accepting new clients for individual therapy focused on helping you move from overthinking to embodied wisdom. If you're ready to break free from inherited survival patterns and create a life that feels as good on the inside as it looks on the outside, I invite you to schedule a complimentary 15-minute consultation to explore how we might work together.

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Remember, the journey to rewriting your story doesn't have to be traveled alone. At JIWS, we're here to guide you every step of the way.